Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Leave My Teeth Alone

I know that almost all of us go to the dentist. It's suppose to be a normal mundane task that we must complete to in order to keep our pearly whites healthy. Well I just need to vent and say how much I really hate going to the dentist. To put it into perspective I once grabbed the arm of a dentist with a 10inch needle in his hand. I hate their silly sunglasses, all the minty stuff they put in my mouth, how hard they floss my teeth, the high pitch trilling sounds of the cleaning and drilling equipment, their criticism of my teeth, and how my dental insurance will only pay for the same dental cleaning and treatments that I've had for over 25 years. It's still the exact same experience I had when I was a kid. With the numerous technological advancements in my lifetime why in hell doesn't every one in American just have their teeth zapped with lasers and call it good. I applaud companies like Biolase and NASA (what?) who are helping us dentally challenge folks.

Oh yeah...I want a flat screen TV, headphones and maybe a video game or two when I go as well.

On the flip side I have a husband who has never had a cavity a day in his life and three kids who sit still as rocks in the dentist chair and look forward to visiting with the hygienist and dentist. I don't want to taint their young minds with my thoughts of the enemy so I always smile and pretend we're all having so much fun.

My now twice daily routine:
Tom's of Maine Toothpaste
Spit and Rinse
ControlRx Vanilla Mint Flavor (icky!)
Spit no Rinse
Act Fluoride
Swish, Spit and Rinse
(That's longer than I spend on my hair.)

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